My son will be 18 on Monday. Though I love him more than anything else in the world, I can't wait for him to leave.
I am so tired of being at the receiving end of his uncontrollable anger. I am totally worn out, depressed and oh, so very disappointed. I have given everything I have to this kid over the past 18 years as a single mom. After he was diagnosed in 1993 I made a committment to always error on his side when in doubt. When I didn't know which way to turn, I always put him first - perhaps that was wrong. But I did my best.
School has been a nightmare, he didn't graduate. He had a few wonderful and supportive teachers, and he also had some incredibly ignorant teachers who should not be allowed in the classroom.
He is extremely smart and so very strong. He is bitter with a huge chip on his shoulder (his father was very abusive and is no longer in his life - he feels abandoned). He is a good person with a huge heart. I see his struggles and know that he has so many roadblocks in front of him - because he is so stubborn.
I feel so much conflict in my heart. What kind of cruel twist for life to give a parent such a beautiful, miracle of a child to love and nurtue, and then have them become such a torturous contradiction.
Are there any other parents of older TS kids out there? Or have any of them survived??